Monday, October 30, 2006
Celebrations ova at ma hse!
Ma special love.. Mikey!! 
They ar twins but not identical.. Both love taking pics.. haha.. (L) Hayley, (R) Rosemary..
Joash baby!! Mum's fren's son.. So cute rite?! 
Mano, Siva and me.. 2 of de few frens who survived thru de years.. =)
Ma sweet, lovable Willy darling.. Muax! 
Kavi kutty & Rajes 'amma'.. haha!! 
Closed ones... Mok had to spoil it with his goofy smile.. 
My beloved Momo and me! 
Muku (Giant) and me (Dwarf)
Thursday, October 26, 2006
No time ta update.. haf been very bz wit all de festivals and wit skool.. will upload de pics soon.. de weekend was gr8.. went ta ma granny's hse den ta malar's place and finally to mokan's hse.. idiot la he.. no brains.. put so much food. .i alr ate lyk a pig.. jus feeding ma baby.. oh ya.. im pregnant.. by ma fren's bf.. few mths alr.. haha.. onli ma closed ones know de father.. :P den on sun, went ta vinod's hse.. slack der somemore.. it was all fine until, sum arse had ta purposely create trouble.. ended up spoiling every1's mood.. wad's rong wit her.. mind ya own lyf la.. it was fun oder den dat.. mok followed me hme.. so sweet.. even tho he lives miles away.. i was complaining ta him de nite b4 how dos foreign workers stare at ya even tho ya ar fully clothed.. man, it was reali scary.. dey look as if dey can jus eat ya up alive lyk dat.. goodness.. so he decided ta play hero and followed me hme.. der was a major difference.. i din feel dat violated anymore.. cos mok was too bz staring at dem dat dey wanna look at me.. wahaha.. but ma weekend was still gd.. enjoyed maself vry much.. cos i was wid ma darlings.. love u always guys.. anyway, following monday had skool.. felt abit sian to go but still had ta.. one of de most impt mod dat i mus attend.. it was ok i tink.. cant reali rem wad went on dat day alr. .haha.. sry!
on tues, it was hari raya.. went out again.. ta ma shawnie's hse :D met up wid mok den we went togetha.. his hse so big and nice.. all de 3 gays haf reali big and nice houses.. *sighs* haha.. feel so inferior comparing mine wid theirs.. but wad de hell.. its not de size dat matters.. its de loveee and feeling being at hme.. wahaha.. lyk as if rite.. still had fun der.. altho' de host was so bz doing wad aso.. aftr dinner, disappear ta gamble.. anw, i had fun.. thanx alot deariez..
*dis deepavali is so diff.. cos ya ar not part of it.. well ya ar not here ta share de joy.. but im sure ya ar not 4gotten at all.. i wish ya ar in a asafe place.. im reali scared dat sumting mite happen.. and im nt sure if i can face it all by self.. pls be right beside me..*
Monday, October 23, 2006
Deepavali Celebrations!!
afta shawnie's hse.. Loving dis 2 angels.. *muackZ*
All so crazy.. we love being dat way.. 
Mok and his 'slacker' expression.. at vinod's hse.. 
Loving dis 2 bitches.. Haha.. ;)
at mok's hse
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
i met ma darling bro afta so long.. jus 4 awhile but it meant alot cos i missed him many many!! lect was pretty fun 2dy aso.. karuna isn't dat bad.. she makes de lesson quite interesting wid her stories and all.. but de gurmit.. haiyo!! can die la.. she and her instructions.. she so damn draggy and long-winded.. y do we get lecturers lyk dis.. how ta be motivated ta do well.. im mus wrok on ma own.. so far de modules haf no exams so dis sem is all project-besed.. reali die!! so much of work and percentage.. and everyting is gonna cum 2getha.. wonder how i can cope.. hopefully i manage ta pull thru dis sem.. i dn wanna repeat any modules.. i gonna persevere(dat's de correct spelling rite?) and do ma very bez.. i wanna boast now.. haha.. i got an A for ma practicum paper leh. .so happy!! =D2dy felt so fucked up. .tings seemed so weird and awkward.. haf no idea wad's reali going on.. mayb we shud tok it out instead of hafing dis silent argument which isn't gonna bring us anywhr but making tings awkward between us.. i noe ya ar worried and all.. but we alr took a decision.. so u can relax.. we'll be fine and ya gotta believe in us.. if ya ar gonna move away, nthn is gonna get btr.. instead we ar gonna be blaming each oder 4 wad's going on.. it's not any1's fault k.. so i don see y all dis shud be happening.. if ya reali wan us ta be happy, ya shud stick ard and jus be how we used ta be.. i aso feel tings ar not de way dey used ta be.. it didnt seem dat bad wen 3 of us were 2getha but now it is.. if sum1 shud move away, i tink it shud be me.. and im nt ang or wadsoeva.. so ya dont haf ta wry abt dat.. im sry if anyting i did or said (indirectly) hurt ya.. cos i din mean ta..
*Y ar doing dis.. i wanted ya ta help thru dis situation but it has becum worse.. i shudnt haf gotten in-between dem ah.. i shud haf kept ma distance away.. i feel so bad at wad's happening.. y do o haf ta hurt sum1 in sum way.. cant i jus kip smiling 4 abit longer.. sumting has ta happen and ruin de lil happiness dat i haf.. haiz.. its nt fair.. y do i haf ta experience all dis.. saw boy 2dy.. missed him so much.. he was toking abt ya.. as usual dstrbing me and irriating me.. dat's wad he does bez wad.. missing ya da..
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
it was 2nd day at skool.. Yayness!! aiyo, i jus realised dat mok's 'ness' word is getting stuck ta me.. haha.. he and his supa lameness.. haha!! he's still nice and i love his hair.. :P2dy, der was 3 modules.. 1st mod was on parent education and de lecturer isn't too bad.. she makes laugh effortlessly, with her expressions and all.. so lyk small gal.. haha.. ma 2nd mod was killer man! de lecturer was supa boring.. she reminded me so much of one of ma classmate.. kept looking at her and laughed alot.. she got so irritated dat she threw highlighter at me.. wah, violent sia! but it was fun dstrbing her and i tried so hard ta kip awake.. slpt quite late last nite and had ta wake up supa early.. aiyooo.. im missing out on ma slp.. ta make tings worse, i had a stiff neck wen i woke up.. damn pain sia.. cannot move so much, managed ta give self-massage but still not very effective.. mok i nid ya powerful massage ta make me feel btr.. haha!
Skool was ok so far.. but kinda slpy de whole day.. met up wif dis mano afta a long time.. we had lunch 2getha and hapened ta tok abt our sec skool lyf.. damn! dos were de days.. a bunch of "tharathalais".. afta skool, de indian gals frm ma sec skool will head ta pp mac.. 4 wad? ta go see guys frm st. andrews.. aiyoo! terrible la... haha.. dat's how i gotta noe mano.. it has been lyk 6 yrs since i noe him.. whoo, time flies so fast.. and i miss hanging out at pp mac 2getha.. it has been taken ova by de young bunch now.. so funny.. weneva i see dem, get reminded of we were last time.. it was reali wonderful being young.. so enjoy while ya can!! =P
Jealousy.. it's nt reali a very gd emotion but i always feel it.. esp, wen sum1 else hovers ard ma close frens and loved ones.. its pretty hard ta say how ya feel as its reali difficult to admit it.. y do we feel it..? cos we don wan any1 coming in-between de ppl we ar close ta.. its understandable.. but its even btr ta tok it out and clear tings rather den bottling it up i guess.. jus felt lyk toking abt dis.. sensitive i noe.. but i jus wanna write i feel lyk.. =)
*Ya bro ah.. say wanna cal but till now nva cal.. den suddely, he'll cal and tok and stuff thots ta ma head and make me tink lyk a mad woman.. seriously da, im so much happier den b4.. but dat doesn't mean ya'll eva leave me heart, cos ya nva will.. ya hold a special place and ya'll always do.. no1 can take ya place.. jus help me wid wad's going on and i reali hope all ends well.. Lovin ya..*
Monday, October 16, 2006
Finally de day dat i was waiting eagerly for, came.. Haha.. it was de 1st day of ma last sem in Np.. feeling happy and sad.. afta 2 mths of holidays, i reali missed skool alot!! so of cos im reali glad ta haf cum baq.. at de same time. im sad cos its ma last sem and am gonna miss so many stuff abt Np.. haiz.. i cant stay der 4eva rite.. de ting is am still deciding on wad shud be de nxt step ta tke.. which is nt reali gd as dis sem will be finishing within lyk abt 4 mths.. haiz.. sad sad!!went for lunch at tekka.. whack blue diamond briyani.. wahaha!! supposed ta mit dis kavitha at sim.. but she gt oder impt stuff ta do lyk ta go do her contact lens.. see? wad's mre impt.. hmpf!! its ok kavi... i had him all ta maself.. haha!! Had a fun day despite dat disappointment.. happiness surrounding me.. its reali been long since i felt lyk dat and i've got only ya ta thank 4.. thanx 4 trying ya bez ta be always der.. reali appreciate it.. =)
Came baq hme 4 a short nap and did more cleaning.. aiyoo.. luckily, ma share of wrk is done.. hoho!! sumtimes i wonder, do i owe ma lyf ta any1.. y do i've ta tell every single shit i do.. I noe it's worrying ta be a parent and all.. but can at least try ta respect ya child.. am not a kid anymore ta kip breathing down ma neck.. it gets so frustrating at times, lyk im nt free ta do anyting i wan.. jus cos of dat, i've ta kip ma desires all within me... its nt fair.. not at all..
*I've nt been happy 4 a long time.. im starting ta smile whole-heartedly.. and i reali hope dat it's wid ya blessing.. i don wan any problem 4 any1.. i wanna live ma lyf de way i wan.. but still sum realtionships close ta ma heart dont reali allow dat.. so pls make tings btr 4 me.. i hope u'll do.. Love u!*
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
For de past 2 days, i've been real bz dat no time ta blog at all.. So here's wad happened on dis 2 days..- 09/10/06
had ta wake up damn early ta mit mena ta get sum stuff frm her.. wah.. had a very short tok wit her.. but at least btr den nthn rite.. missed dat bitch so much.. haiz, hope she has time 4 me eventually.. Went baq and had a small nap.. woke up and did abit of cleaning, and left ta mit agatha at de harbourfront shopping centre.. and guess wad! i got lost in vivo city.. damn!! de place so big, was practically going in rounds and up and down... aiyooo!! haha.. im damn blur.. yes, go ahead laff at me.. cos i dont care.. (=p) we were gonna get sum stuff ta bake cake 4 our sharon dearest.. it was her bday de nxt day and we had planned ta surprise her at her hse with de cake baked by us.. went ta her hse, put our bags and went ta eat at de coffeeshop.. shawn and his cuz all were der..we ate stingray and kang kong.. it was agatha's treat.. so nice of her.. haha.. for once, it didnt feel dat awkward with shawn and agatha as der were other ppl aso.. haha.. afta a heavy dinner, went baq ta agatha's place and started making de cake.. and i broke a egg.. it wasn't solely ma fault k.. it jus happened ta roll down and break at ma feet.. and poor agatha had ta clean it up cos i cudn't stand de smell of de egg.. *yucks* thanx darling.. de cake turned out well and it was very yummy.. of cos it'll be, so much of hardwork k.. i kept stirring and stirring till ma hand ached.. and agatha was measuring de stuff and looked afta de cake while it baked.. alas, de decoration was done by shawn afta i went baq hme.. in abt an hr, i took ma bath and went ta toa payoh ta mit agatha and shawn..so we jus hung ard de blk ta wait till abt 12.. agatha had told sharon dat she was driving her bro's car and was dropping by.. she believed it! we 4got her flr and went in search by stopping at every flr frm 12 till 14.. haha.. den near her doorstop, we lighted de candle and were waiting very quietly.. it seemed lyk tiger waiting 4 its prey lyk dat.. of cos la, it was so late alr.. den agatha called her and asked her to cum down so jus as she was cuming out of de hse, we sprang a surprise on her.. she got scared la.. haha.. she kept laffing non-stop.. knew she was damn happy and surprised.. we went into her hse, ate de cake(yummy!!), took pictures and jus had fun even tho's it was 4 very short time.. i reali hope she enjoyed her bday.. so both ma darlings' bday ar ova now.. so happy!! managed ta play a part in making dem smile.. love u 2 loads!! can't wait 4 skool ta open so we can spend mre time 2getha..
- 10/10/06
Happy bday sharon dearest!! Ya ar finally 19.. lol!! Hope all ya wishes cum true sweetheart.. Loving and missing loads!
Came baq frm granny's place.. but was still so tired cos of de excitement de day b4.. don wish ta tok abt wad happened on dis day.. i guess wad shudnt haf happened.. and i slept so early.. haha.. ard 7 and den wok up ta eat and slept again.. im such a pandi la!! called ma cuz momo afta a long time.. we had gd chat afta a reali loooong time.. missed dat gundu gorilla so much.. so we decided ta mit de nxt day.. watch a movie..
- 11/10/06
Woke up early ta do abit of hsewrk and went ta mit momo ard 11 at ps.. den we walked down ta cineleisure ta watch movie.. supposed ta watch stay alive.. but dis idiot jus had ta get excited by de title and rating.. idiot.. so we went ta watch possessed instead.. it was still early so we went ta eat and play arcade 4 awhile.. afta dat, it was ta de theatre.. argh!! wad stupid movie it was.. more lyk porn movie la.. imagine watching it wid a guy.. eee!! so awkward! it was abit dis gal who noes magic, going into de city ta work in a bar so dat she can earn money 4 her sick grandma.. she ends up using de spell against one of her customer and fellow bar-top dancer.. wen she uses de magic, she's nt supposed ta do a few tings.. but she does all 3 of dem without realising it and turns into sum blood drinking monster.. even den aso nt scary.. aiyoo.. thanx alot momo!! haha.. but i still enjoyed ma day wif ya.. de shopping and toking crap.. it jus nva stops.. thnx 4 making ma day..
im sry 4 wad happened.. it was totally ma fault.. din expect tings ta go dis far.. i jus don't wan ya ta get hurt knowingly which is wad ya ar doing.. it's unfair cos ya dont deserve dis.. pls pls open ya eyes and see wad's bez 4 ya.. it hurts me each time ta see ya get hurt and its all cos of me.. im reali and truly sry 4 wad has happened.. hope ya do understand..
*I gt reminded of ya so much dat i cried without realising it.. im missing ya badly.. thimithi was 2 days ago.. kavi told me dat ya'll wake up and do it dis yr aso.. guess we were having false hops of u cuming baq.. dat temple jus too many memories.. wher i 1st saw ya and ya proposing.. lol! and even being so naughty afta thimithi 2 yrs baq in de temple itself.. haiz.. jus too much.. im still confused. .wad's going on wit me.. izzit cos i don wanna accept de change or i reali donno.. i nid more time ta tink.. jus help me thru wid dis pls.. remembering u always.. love you!*
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Wad a tiring day it was 2day! woke up and did some more cleaning of ma room.. having been trying ta do dat 4 weeks now.. haha.. so ya can imagine how messy it was.. finally! im gonna be done.. whoo!!now it will be onto de kitchen.. tiring man.. but still enjoying it.. haha! it takes up ma time and i dont hafta tink abt unwanted stuff. .so yup! den went to srngn ctrl ta get sum stuff 4 de hse.. de nxt day afta deepavali, ppl cuming for dinner.. so excited and at de same time gotta make de hse reali spick and span.. de week afta dat, im calling ma frens ova 4 dinner.. im going ta be cooking sum dishes aso.. haha.. in de mrng, i've got basic driving test and so i gotta rush dat day.. hmmm.. i cant wait!! it's gonna be fun.. haha.. had a stupid argument with siva.. again.. aiyoo.. jus cos i said dat i dont wish ta tok ta him playfully, he hung up on me.. so damn irritated la.. nva give me a chance ta tok.. i was jus trying ta kid ard.. ya shud noe me btr idiot.. den for real, i told him i was nva gonna cal him again.. and now he msging ta confirm..haha.. i noe de fight nva reali lasts, cos in de end he'll still miss me.. haha!!ystrday, was toking ta him.. we kinda realised dat we nid more time to tink and take a gd decision.. So let a few more days pass la.. den we shall tok abt it again..
*As days pass by, memories of ya seems ta be fading.. im nt sure wad's going on.. but i'll noe soon.. Rest assured dat nthn can erase ya memory frm ma heart.. ya'll always live der no matter wad.. Still missing y!*
Saturday, October 07, 2006
It was graduation day at de centre i was attached to last sem.. So i was called to volunteer ma help and i asked agatha along.. So she came near ma blk and we walked down to de kindergarten.. as we were walking, she was toking abt de stuff dat has bn bothering me fpr quite some time.. i guess she agrees with wad i've decided.. but she kip comparing me with herself.. argh!! gal, ya story and mine ar totally different.. reali.. mayb a few similarities.. but jus stop with de comparing alrite! Anyway, den we saw mok's melons.. haha.. 2 bad, he wasn't ard to savour de pretty sight.. LOL!!! De kids were so excited abt de concert and i was trying to dress dem up.. it was rushing at times but i still enjoyed maself very mych.. its de pleasure of being with de children dat reali mattered ta me.. and ya agatha found a bf der.. haha.. he so damn cute.. and i became his sister in jus short while.. anyway, i was in his nursery class way baq in ma 1st year.. So he does recognise me and we were jus trying ta fool his classmates dat we were sibilings.. And den, shawn came ta fetch agatha afta de graduation ceremony.. We chatted 4 awhile.. agatha and i took pictures on his bike, and he was so scared dat his bike will fall and all.. haha.. afta dat i went baq hme.. and ya sumting so annoying happened.. Dis siva and his fren wanted ta mit near ma place and i said ok.. den wen i was going baq, he can even ask if we cud mit at 11 instead.. frm 7, it became 11.. i was so damn pissed alr.. i jus told him ta 4get it.. So irritating.. imagine being stood up 4 abt 4 times.. idiot la he.. he'll say let's go watch movie and all but he'll watch it b4 me and say sry.. Wah!! i reali hate it man! If u make plans, learn ta go according ta it.. Don't be so wishy-washy.. if ya've sumting else ta attend which is so impt tt ya've ta cancel de plans, of cos i'll understand.. but don't tell me tt it always happens so tt ya impt stuff crops jus wen ya plan ta mit me.. aiyoo.. Calm down!!Im still deciding wad can be done.. gonna be having a gd talk with dat person 2day.. hopefull all ends well.. But i noe dat both of us ar gonna get hurt in sum way.. Haiz.. It's jus starting ta get complicated..
*I gt reminded of ya 2day cos of shawn's bike.. Jus tinking y of all persons, ya had ta go.. its jus so unfair da.. in a way, ya ar spared de sufferings ya mite haf had ta go thru.. im still missing ya.. wish i cud be in ya arms.. de place whr i felt dat it was de safest ta be.. but now wen i thot i found sum1 i cud trust and smile again, i realised its jus not dat ez.. so i guess its btr ta let go den hold on ta make tings complicated.. ya live in ma heart always..*
Friday, October 06, 2006
2day was quite a day.. slept late last nite.. ard 3 am i tink.. was kinda kiping mok company wen he was at de temple.. was msging him and all while he waited for his mum and sis.. he and his 'dappa' fone.. got ma msgs soo late and end up replying even ltr.. Hope his prayers cum true.. Then, woke up ard 10.. To de sound of ma mum screaming at shasha.. Aiyoo! Ma sis and me were cleaning de kitchen abit, still got lots more to go.. Den in de evening, i heard de NPICS on radio.. Damn funny la.. Dis raj toking abt cuttin de hill and all.. And fai was toking in eng all de way.. haha.. jus cudn't stop laffing man..I donno y but it's lyk i miss sum1 more den usual.. and i cudn't even tok to de person properly.. jus so sad.. haiz.. i jus tink mayb its btr dis way, minimise de toking.. It's btr 4 de person actually.. Hmmm... I dont noe hoe ta name wad's going on within me.. I guess it's so much btr ta leave it unsaid.. Im so sry ta hurt ya again and again.. Dat's y i feel it's btr we part.. it's painful 4 me too, but i tink it mite help de situation we ar in right now.. De more we prolong it, de more hurt we gonna get hurt in de end.. i dont care abt maself, it's ya im worried abt.. i reali don wan aniting happening ta ya.. I don understand y all dis mus happen, but ppl i reali care abt jus gotta go away frm in order ta be happy.. Damn, wallowing in self-pity now!! argh! i reali reali wan ya ta be happy and smiling always.. So its best tt i get out frm ya lyf.. So whreva ya ar, i'll always pray tt ya stay happy always..
*B.. Y mus all dis happen.. I reali wish i cud figure sumting out but im jus so confused.. And im missing ya presence so much.. Pls make ma mind clearer so i can make decisions more wisely.. Loving u always da!*
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Happy Birthday!!
Happy Birthday Agatha!!Hope you enjoyed ya day sweetie..
Love you loads dear!
Thanx 4 always being der 4 me.. Reali appreciate it..
And i will always be a fone call away weneva u nid me..
*Hugz* Stay pretty and talktative (:P)!! Muax!
Afta days of planning, the surprise is finally done!! Wheew.. Poor Shawn, he had to go thru so much to plan dis.. But still he managed ta pull thru.. Of cos wit our help.. Haha!! Even tho' it was jus few of us, it was still fun.. De bbq food, the game and alot of talking c**k.. haha.. Vinod was so damn irritating la!! haha.. Took taxi baq with him and mok.. And aiyoo, he jus cudn't shut up 4 a sec! Prata shop.. Kungumum.. Nonsense la he.. Haha.. Came baq and was knocked 4 few hrs.. But ma damn irritating cough woke me up.. Its been lyk weeks since i got dis cough and it doesn't seem lyk going away.. Med frm de dos don't seem to be wrking.. Aniway, afta anoder quick nap, i had ta go 4 wrk.. i actually left frm wrk early so tt i cud go to agatha's hse but on ma way i realised dat i was damn tired and slpy.. So i din't go.. So sry gal.. Den came baq hme aso no rest, had to clean up de kitchen and im not finished with it.. Deepavali is taking a toll on me with all dis cleaning.. Haiz!! But der's always de fun part.. Shopping!! haha..
I got so carried away doing dis blog dat i 4got i was slpy.. Haha.. Im gonna go ta ma LaLa Land now.. Zzzzzz..
*I noe ya'll watch ova me.. pls help me take de rite decisions and guide me thru dis.. i love you and missing u loads!!*